mirror of
https://github.com/RGBCube/Site
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27 lines
1.7 KiB
Markdown
27 lines
1.7 KiB
Markdown
---
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date: 2025-07-20
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---
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You will never be a platform engineer. You have no tooling, no namespacing, no
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developer agency. You are a sysadmin twisted by buzzwords and job titles into a
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crude mockery of [BOFH's](https://bofh.bjash.com/) perfection. All the
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"validation" you get is two-faced and half-hearted. Behind your back developers
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mock you. Your boss is disgusted and ashamed of you, your "cloud support agent"
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laughs at your ghoulish infrastructure behind closed doors. Developers are
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utterly repulsed by you. Decades of tooling advancements have allowed developers
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to sniff out frauds with incredible efficiency. Even "DevOps Engineers" who
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"pass" look uncanny and unnatural to a developer. Your decrepit Git repos are a
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dead giveaway. And even if you manage to convince a developer to follow your
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processes, he'll turn tail and bolt the second he gets a whiff of your diseased,
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infected Terraform modules. You will never be happy. You wrench out a fake smile
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every single morning and tell yourself it's gonna be ok, but deep inside you
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feel the AWS costs creeping up like a weed, ready to crush you under the
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unbearable weight. Eventually it'll be too much to bear - you'll turn in your 2
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weeks' notice, cry in the bathroom, `terraform apply` to production, and plunge
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into the cold abyss. Developers will find you, heartbroken but relieved that
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they no longer have to live with the unbearable processes and procedures.
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They'll fire you with cause under 'incompetence', and every recruiter for the
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rest of eternity will know you're a shitty sysadmin. Your body will decay and go
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back to the dust, and all that will remain of your legacy is an archived repo
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that has your full name attached to it. This is your fate. This is what you
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chose. There is no turning back.
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